She is a woman

If you kiss her, you are not a gentleman 
If you don't, you are not a man 

If you praise her, she thinks you are lying 
If you don't, you are good for nothing 

If you agree to all her likes, you are a wimp 
If you don't, you are not understanding 

If you visit her often, she thinks it is boring 
If you don't, she accuses you of double-crossing 

If you are well dressed, she says you are a playboy 
If you don't, you are a dull boy 

If you are jealous, she says it's bad 
If you don't, she thinks you do not love her 

If you attempt a romance, she says you didn't respect her 
If you don't, she thinks you do not like her 

If you are a minute late, she complains it's hard to wait 
If she is late, she says that's a girl's way 

If you visit another man, you're not putting in "quality time" 
If she is visited by another woman, "oh it's natural, we are girls" 

If you kiss her once in a while, she professes you are cold 
If you kiss her often, she yells that you are taking advantage 

If you fail to help her in crossing the street, you lack ethics 
If you do, she thinks it's just one of men's tactics for seduction 

If you stare at another woman, she accuses you of flirting 
If she is stared by other men, she says that they are just admiring 

If you talk, she wants you to listen 
If you listen, she wants you to talk 

In short: 
So simple, yet so complex 
So weak, yet so powerful 
So damning, yet so wonderful 
So confusing, yet so desirable......

She is a woman.